I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize