I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Randomize
