It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Randomize
