Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize
