Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Last time i carry you out of a forest
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
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