I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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