S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
