so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Randomize
