i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
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