i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
