I think scott just propositioned me for sex
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
We have started to decorate penises.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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