You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
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