What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
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