Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
