You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Randomize
