physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
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