Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
