fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
Randomize
