Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
false alarm, still single
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
