guys are not supposed to queef...right?
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
