im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
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