The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize
