census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
