you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Non-Jews are for practice
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
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