his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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