I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
