hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
