Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
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