Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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