Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
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