Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
porn star boner night. come get it.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
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