At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
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