bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize