You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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