I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Randomize
