Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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