You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
