We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
Randomize
