We're facebook friends in real life
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
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