Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
Randomize
