her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
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