I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Randomize
