I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
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