toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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