When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
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