I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
