Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
