I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize