so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
I supernannyed him into submission
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
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