420 ftw
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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