My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
either way he was missing a nipple.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize